This week the editorial board of the Pahrump Valley Times came up with this novel idea: Politician Amnesty Week.
Here’s how it works, our vision of it anyway. Every election year politicians are careful to say mostly what they believe voters want to hear. They try their darnedest to pander to their base on some issues, distinguish themselves — usually only in very miniscule ways — from their opponents on others and generally avoid any real stance whatsoever when it comes to subjects of true controversy.
That’s hard to do! (Don’t try it at home!)
Only the best among them can do it for any real length of time (you can be president someday if you can master this Jedi mindtrick.)
Well, not all of us are a Barry Obama or a G-Dub (that’s a George W. Bush reference for you older readers). So many good candidates go down in flames because, God forbid, they actually tell it like it is (more like how they see it) on some subject or another. And frankly, it’s our damn fault (the media in general, not the PVT’s specifically) that politicians are so cautious.
So, that’s where Amnesty Week comes in. For one week during each election cycle, those seeking political office should be allowed to say exactly what they feel — about anything — without any repercussion from the media. Tweet your shorts off (literally even). Talk about your love affairs and infidelities (even if your best friend might get hurt). Tell us everything.
Voters, just think, you could finally elect someone based on exactly who that person is and what they believe versus what that person’s manipulated public relations image was manufactured to resemble.
Imagine how exhilarating this could be for our democracy.
Real honesty. Real change. Real informed votes.
Alas, good luck.
Look on page one of this newspaper. Our newest U.S. Senator, Dean Heller, sat down in his fancy new digs in D.C. and gave us little rural reporters a few scoops. (Scoops of hot air mostly). In grand GOP fashion, Heller attacked our beloved Hawaiian-Kenyan commander in chief’s leadership of the American economy first: Unemployment is up 2 million people, oh my; the unemployment rate rose 17 percent, oh no; shucks, gas prices doubled; and gee whiz, the federal debt is up over one-third to $11,000 per person. All since Barry took over!
But wait, there’s more: Food stamp recipients have increased 40 percent; health insurance premiums have gone up 20 percent; and, home values dropped nationally 12 percent.
Well, not great news, that’s for sure. But, really senator. The president did all that, did he? See, during Amnesty Week, Sen. Heller could get away with throwing those darts at our commander in chief. Heck, we’d even let him use the N-word out here in the rurals (Naw, we wouldn’t). Same goes for all the Republicans representing our great state. Democrats, too.
Too bad, though.
This ain’t Amnesty Week.
Sen. Heller, come up with something else to blame President Obama for besides this economy. Maybe Afghanistan or Guantanamo or something (oh, wait, your base. Damn!)
Get this straight. The jig is up: Republicans talking about Obama screwing up the economy is so far from reality as to make us wonder what drugs you’re taking. Remember this whole housing crash? Remember who was in office when banks were allowed to leverage themselves to the hilt? Remember who was in power in Washington when Credit Default Swaps and Collaterialized Debt Obligations were left totally unregulated despite numerous warnings? Subprime loans? Do you know which party the financial services sector contributed to most in the last 10 election cycles? Do you realize that the deficit doubled because we had to bail out your corporate overlords? Remember the banks, the auto industry, AIG, Bear Stearns, Lehman Brothers? Barry wasn’t there when this ship started sinking, though he may end up going down with it anyway.
What happened when the whole bubble burst? Unemployment, foreclosures, federal debt, etc. All those things you blame poor Barry for, was really all your party’s fault, seeing as how you guys were large and in charge when it happened. We do blame you, and nothing you say will change that. Sorry.
Anyway. Thanks for the rural press conference. We’ll keep our chins up here in the land of foreclosures and high unemployment.
We’ll see you at the next presser. And please, feel free to speak your mind. We will.