Stuck on stupid is as stupid does

I have an exceptionally low level of tolerance for stupidity. Which I guess helps explain why I fight so hard to shrink the size of government. Let’s face it, government is Stupidity Central.

Yet – and I think we can thank the government schools at least partially for this – the stupidity virus is spreading throughout society and I fear we may be on the verge of a pandemic. (Remember when government made “pandemic” a household word during the bird flu scare of 2004?)

Two recent examples…

I was having trouble with my iPhone. So I called Verizon. Spent about 10 minutes in “Press 1 for…” hell before being put on hold “for the next available customer service representative.”

I then spent the next one hour, 23 minutes and 17 seconds on the phone with a technical support lady (who, miraculously, actually spoke understandable English). Alas, no luck. So the nice lady said she was going to have to transfer me to a higher level technician and that I’d probably be put on hold for 15-20 minutes.

Me: “I can’t wait on hold for 15-20 minutes. Can you have the technician call me back at this number when he’s free?”

Her: “I’m sorry, but we don’t have a system set up to call you back.”

Me: “Wait, this is Verizon, right?”

Her: “Yes.”

Me: “And you’re a telephone company, right?”

Her: “Yes.”

Me: “And you don’t have a system set up to call me back on the phone?”

Her: “That’s right.”

Aarrgghh!!!

A few hours later I’m standing in line at the Golden Nugget waiting to get my parking ticket validated after taking the kids to see Gallagher – a smashing good show!

As I stood in line facing the Burger King-like counter, there was a wall to my far right. To the left of the wall was a line for VIP’s to get their parking tickets stamped. Then my son holding my hand. Me. And to my left a slot machine.

Now bear in mind, I was told this was the only place to get my parking ticket validated. And there was one other person in front of me. Then the lady behind the counter looked up, saw me and CJ, and came out from behind the counter.

Her: “Sir, your son can’t stand so close to a slot machine. Could he go around the corner and stand in front of the men’s room until I stamp your ticket.”

Me: “Are you nuts? You want my 7-year-old son to go stand in front of a men’s room in a casino, out of my sight, by himself, while I wait in line for you to stamp my parking ticket? No! No, he can’t do that.”

And some people still wonder how liberals get elected?

Mr. Muth is president of Citizen Outreach, a conservative grassroots advocacy organization. He can be reached at www.MuthsTruths.com.